This one actually pains me because Robin Sachs is one of my favorite actors (RIP, sir), but Zaeed Massani is just … somehow boring. And he shouldn’t be. He founded the Blue Suns, for god’s sake. He has a favorite gun named Jessie. He looks like he’s seen some shit and even has a bionic eye!

How on earth did this guy become my least favorite character??

Honestly, I think a biggest part of it is that his character is DLC. Both he and Kasumi don’t fit in the larger narrative of the second game because they were both additions. Even their dialogue aboard the Normandy is stilted because you don’t have character-building cut scenes like you do with the other main cast members.

With Kasumi, her loyalty mission was different from the rest of the game. Sure, you end up fighting the main bad guy in a gunship, a la Garrus’ recruitment mission, but the first couple of parts include a gala and Ocean’s 11-style shenanigans. And then in ME3, that same loyalty mission was tied into her storyline on the Citadel, so even though she was tacked on, she at least felt like she was a part of the team by the end of the series.

In contrast, Zaeed’s loyalty mission was nothing really that different from other Blue Suns-focused side missions, and other than possibly being able to kill Zaeed at the end of it, not much changes with him; if you go the paragon route and allow Vido Santiago to escape, he’s still like, “Well, I need to kill that bastard.” And his presence in ME3 is equally disappointing and ultimately kind of pointless.

Which is super sad – Ethan Rayne deserved better.

Art Credit: eTeknix, Rock Paper Shotgun