I lasted five days. Honestly, I managed to get farther than I thought I was going to be able to, so I call this a victory.

Now, I didn’t just think, “I’ll just stop right now because I can’t do it.” I needed to have reasons, so like any person who willfully dismisses the scientific process by looking for data that supports their hypothesis instead of just raw data, I decided to do a bit more research into it. I’m not saying that Whole30 doesn’t have its merits, but according to the majority of the medical journals I read (and the dietitians I talked to), a) it takes longer than 30 days to “reset” your digestive system and b) it’s not really scientifically backed. If you’re going to do an elimination diet, which is essentially what Whole30 is, it’s best to do it under the guidance of a dietitian (not a nutritionist, because I could call myself a nutritionist – there isn’t any kind of education/testing/accreditation you have to complete in order to adopt that title, so I always take people who say they are nutritionists with a healthy dose of skepticism) and/or physician.

I’m totally going to use a lot of the recipes I discovered on my workweek journey into the Whole30 universe because they were incredibly tasty, specifically the frittata and spaghetti (using spaghetti squash, lean ground turkey, and homemade tomato sauce). And I also realized that I do need to start actually making food instead of ordering out or snacking on crap junk food. I also have only had two sodas in one week, and I don’t even really want any; they’re just a bit too sweet, and I can get my caffeine from tea and coffee, anyway (which I already don’t sweeten). But before I was addicted to ’em, even if I didn’t really enjoy drinking them that much.

I still don’t have a great relationship with food – I’ll be writing about that later on this week – but I do think I’m not as scared to cook for myself. My attempt at making mayo was pretty sad (I poured the oil in too fast and didn’t wait until my eggs were room temp), but I was successful in making a meal for my parents (the above mentioned spaghetti) that had even my dad saying it was tasty.

Anyway, I’m a quitter, but whatever. I at least have the memories.