I lost my keys on Wednesday and didn’t realize it until Saturday afternoon.

First of all, I didn’t need them since 1) I was in Savannah, 2) we took my sister’s car, and 3) I didn’t actually get into a car at all until Saturday. Second, I have a very good reason that they suddenly disappeared.

Walk with me, won’t you?

Travel always has its risks, you know? Nobody can predict what craziness is going to happen on the road, even if you plan ahead and drive the speed limit and pay attention to other drivers both in front of and behind you. And those other drivers sometimes start car chases.

Now, I was asleep when this whole thing began. My sister, the driver at the time, was letting me nap in the back seat since I’d worked the entire night before and was starting to lag a bit, and she passed by this silver SUV who’d been pulled over by a cop, probably for speeding honestly, but who knows.

Just a few seconds went by, and then suddenly, she’s noticing something a little off.

“Um, what’s happening? Is this a car chase? Oh, it’s a car chase. It’s a car chase.”

When I hear these words, I immediately perk up and look around frantically until I see a silver SUV drive by rather speedily, trying to bob and weave around all the other cars and semis that are rather inconveniently also there, and I grimace as the SUV nearly hits another car before swerving in front of another semi.

“Shit, he’s gonna cause a wreck, the idiot.”

Then … crash.

We don’t see anything, mainly due to the sheer amount of semis on the road, but damn, that sound is imprinted on my brain now. All of traffic comes to a stop, and I’m craning my neck to see where the wreck happened. And then I see this giant semi on the side of the road, completely totaled, and a cop car that’s also absolutely demolished. I have no idea where the SUV is, but my Nurse Alarm goes off. My sister pulls over, and I bolt out, my fanny pack still hanging from my waist, my hair however it looked, and my mind completely on the lives of the people in front of me. I remember hearing a clang but think nothing of it. As I get closer to the site, it keeps getting worse and worse. I pay barely any attention to the driver of the getaway car, who’s being dragged out of the SUV by the cops in another car, my eyes focused on the poor truck driver who’s literally falling out of the cab.

Another truck driver is already there, trying to talk him down, and I run up, announcing that I’m a nurse, and immediately begin my examination, even though he is adamant about calling his work to report the incident.

“Sir, what’s your name? What’s your birthday? What year is it? Track my fingers without moving your head. Do you feel any pain? Does that pain radiate?”

I am just rapid-fire asking questions and feeling around on this poor man to make sure he isn’t going to keel over and die in front of me (I already dealt with that back in November 2021), and luckily EMS gets there quickly. The sister has joined me at this point, asking the police officer from the demolished cruiser – who miraculously had not a single scratch on him but appeared profoundly pissed – if he needed anything, and within a few moments, we’re able to get back into our car and continue our trip to Savannah, GA, luckily much less eventful than the first 3/4 of the drive.

Remember that clang? Well, I didn’t until Saturday when I was rifling through my fanny pack, looking for my keys. I remember noticing that one of the pockets on my fanny pack was open as I was getting out to check out the scene, and honestly, I searched through every nook and cranny in my sister’s car. The only place they could possibly be is on the roadside somewhere between Atlanta and Savannah.

This is wildly annoying because 1) my mom and dad need to get their truck into the backyard to retrieve his trailer, 2) I have like a job and shit that I need to go to, and 3) my car is so old that no automotive shops have replacement key fobs for it. I’ve ordered one online, and it should arrive on the 28th, which really isn’t that long, but still.

I’m proud of myself for springing into Nurse Action Hero but annoyed that I forgot to check the ground to see what that clang was all about. I suppose taking care of others takes precedence, but the next time something like that happens, I’m gonna pay attention.

Also, don’t try to run from cops. It never works out like you think it will.