I’m going to try and do NaNoWriMo again this year (add me, jujujuniper, if you want any more accountabilibuddies!), and honestly? I may be able to win … I have been spending a lot of time coming up with the plot and characters for my project, and the level of excitement I have for it outshines anything I have felt the past several years.

Part of me has, since 2009, dreaded November. Writing 50,000 words over a month is a pretty big task, and it’s always super discouraging whenever I see people spit out, like, 15,000 words on the first day. I’m happy if I meet the minimum of 1666 words, but it’s still pretty demoralizing, especially when writer’s block hits me square on the head. A few years ago, I had such a great start and got to about 16,000 words on time, and then … I just stopped. I’d lost whatever spark I’d had up until that point, and I can’t even really explain why. Well, I can actually explain why.

Like I’ve mentioned in at least a couple blog posts here and there, I’m reevaluating a lot in my life. I just want to enjoy the things I love again, without that little voice in the back of my head telling me to produce something that will get me at least some local fame. Like … would I like to become the next George RR Martin? Neil Gaiman? Non-transphobic JK Rowling? I mean, I’d be lying if I said no, but it’s not my dream anymore. Well, it’s not at the forefront, at least.

Back in October 2022, I went to Florida with some friends right after I’d taken my NCLEX, and I was not looking forward to the ride down. I would be driving by myself in my rickety old car (RIP, Athena), and I was so stressed about the test I’d taken with no feedback that, at the beginning of the trip, I almost just turned around to head home. But then something clicked. I stared into the standstill traffic I’d run into and just said:

“I. Am on. Vacation.”

The drive was perfect. I put in all the mixed CDs I’d created for the trip and rolled down my window, disregarding any bad drivers and going the speed limit the whole time, just enjoying the experience. Granted, I’d have to repeat my mantra several times, especially driving through Birmingham, but I’d just turn up the music and take a breath.

And this is the attitude I’m going to bring with me into November.

I’m even approaching prepping in a different manner than I have in previous years. NaNo calls it “plantsing,” a combination of pantser (you go in with no plan and maybe an idea) and planner (self-explanatory), and it provides me the structure I need without the strict organization that would actually petrify me. So far, I’ve got a pretty decent idea about the story and the characters, and although there’s a few kinks – like how to end the damn thing – to work out, I’m actually looking forward to next month.

I’ll try to post some updates as I go, and maybe even some excerpts if I like what I’ve written. Can’t guarantee anything, obviously, because my whole goal is to enjoy what I’m doing, and as I may have mentioned previously in other posts, I am pretty terrible at putting out content just to have it be out there. Plus, I just don’t have any fun when I’m doing anything with that mindset.

But in all seriousness, please feel free to add me on NaNo if you’re gonna be a part of it this year. I’m always looking for writing friends and could use some people to commiserate with.

Here’s to November!